anyone who doesn’t reblog this is a filthy liar
I try to see if I can use the force on a regular basis.
part of the reason i studied so hard was so i could move shit with my mind like matilda
I have tried to use my Matilda powers pretty much daily for the past 15 years.
when you yell “puppy!” at a lil doge and they get happy and wag their lil tail like “yess!! i am a puppy!! a baby dog!!! thank you!!!!!!”
When you yell “puppy!!!!” At an old doge and they wag their tail and get all happy like “yes I am still a little doge thank you for noticing! !”
I’m sorry I can’t come to the phone right now. I’m busy cutting open Fruit Gushers and squeezing all of the goo into a glass so I can take a shot of it because that has always been a dream of mine and now that I’m an adult with a job, I finally have the means to make it a reality. Please leave your name and number after the beep.